Any room left for romantic love?

The timing of the post, i.e. one day after the commercial festival of celebrating romantic love which should be fostered every day, is haphazard. Also, it is not linked to the 17th anniversary of launching PES (dammit, this blog spans nearly my entire adult life and in four years, if I carry on, it will cover a half of my lifetime).

As I grow older, I also turn less romantic and more pragmatic. I would probably be unable to fall in love like a teenager, but circumstances permitting, the chemistry in my brain would do its job for a while, but I would put it down to mostly to sexual drive, not just to pure affection. As the fellow blogger posits, understand your biology, then rise above it.

Even if I don't stay at home and grab opportunities to meet new people, rules of statistics are against me. Even if I get to know 20 new people each week, which looks like a decent outcome, statistically half of them are men, most women are not in the age range of my lookout, those who are in their 30s might be in relationships, might not be physically attractive, might not find me attractive, might not be interested in raising a family. And so the next filters relentlessly narrow down the circle of potential life companions.

My generation is the first one not to feel the coercion to raise a family, which now looms as an option only for those who instinctually don't want our species to extinct. We are also witnessing a generation of independent women, cherishing equal rights, with the side effect of realising having a man by their side does not have to add value. Being in a relationship is viewed as beneficial if drawbacks of giving up on a woman's independence are offset with a surplus by what a man contributes to the relationship. Otherwise a male life companion is (for a growing fraction of women) a ball and chain. With the bar raised that high, a growing majority of men do not live up to women's expectations, some even give up on trying.

For many reasons, including the above, we observe a growing percentage of singletons in the society, many of whom have never been in a serious (involving making commitments or living under one roof) relationship, thus many lacking relationship-building competencies. Once you get used to living on your own and not minding anyone, letting in somebody to your life, changing habits, routines and plans involves some effort. This remark applies to me. In my life filled with work, volunteering, friends, helping parents, doing sports and other stuff, I also need to choose to make room to let somebody in.

Women and men are sadly at war today. The most common explanation, which is true, but not universal, is that women have moved ahead with their social advancement, while men have not caught up. In more complicated cases it turns out even those men who do not lag behind are insufficient, since they meet only 90% of women’s expectations are hence are not knights on white horses. Women are sick of bitter experiences inflicted by immature men, men are sick of women’s exorbitant requirements. Their picture of the conflict between females and males is grossly simplified. Besides, movements such as MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) are not fix. Taking umbrage with how the world has moved on and blaming women for their own backwardness and other intellectual hollow is an approach I will never embrace (mark my words).

Stowarzyszenie Wiosna brought to account

My charity involvement experience in 2025 - has already been comprehensively summarised and since then, I have not changed my mind with respect to far-reaching criticism towards Szlachetna Paczka's arrangers. The 2025 edition will be finalised for me in late March 2026, when a sofa, ordered just recently and replacing a shoddy one bought online by donators and returned to the shop, is delivered.

In one of the discussions past the final weekend, the leader asked about Stowarzyszenie Wiosna's financial statement. The penny dropped, while I dropped everything to look into publicly available financials of the organisation for 2024.

The key findings are perplexing:
- In 2024 Stowarzyszenia Wiosna raised over PLN 31 million from private and corporate donators.
- Expenses for aid to those in need reached to more than PLN 4.5 million.
- As a non-profit organisation, it regularly produced operating profit of over PLN 6 million yearly and earned interest income of over PLN 1 million yearly from financial assets it held.
- At the end of 2024 the entity behind Szlachetna Paczka accumulated PLN 28 million in cash and bank deposits and PLN 6 million in corporate and government bonds. Financial assets increased by PLN 7 million vs. end of 2023.

Jaw drops open. Why has nobody made a mess about those numbers if the figures are within everyone's reach?

In early January 2026 I received an open invitation for an in-person meeting with Stowarzyszenia Wiosna's representatives in Warsaw, held yesterday. I signed up for it, wondering how much room for a genuine and open discussion would be given by the event's hosts.

It turned out the four-hour event was attended by mere 60 people and over most of its time we were split into five groups. The teamwork we had been meant to do was not fully done, as short discussion panels morphed into bitter experience sharing and I did not shun taking part in it. Stowarzyszenie Wiosna's employees listened carefully to all regrets spoken out during the sessions. Time will tell, if they take it to hearts. 

With respect to cash-richness of Stowarzyszenia Wiosna, I raised my reservations in person to one of executives after the event ended. We had a frank discussion, however I do not buy in the explanation that PLN 34 million is an atomic-case scenario reserve to carry on with the next edition if zero donations are made next year. Firstly because during 15 years of my hands-on experience in corporate finance I have never seen proceeds of any organisation going down by 100%, nor any entity bracing for such scenario. Secondly, because yearly running costs of Stowarzyszenie Wiosna are some PLN 10 million lower than its cash cushion, hence at least some room for depletion is given.

My mission is completed. I have accomplished more or less as much planned, i.e. spoke up, were audible, with little hope anything is going to change. Fighting itself ought to be a virtue even if you are fighting a losing battle. Sometimes you don't lay down your weapons just to assure yourself when you look in the mirror, you see a face of a man who acts righteously.

WOŚP

If I was to come up with the most renowned, but also the most controversial charity initiative in Poland, without hesitation I would point at Wielka Orkiestra Świątecznej Pomocy. Those who’d wish to translate its name into English could scratch their heads to figure out what Świąteczna stands for. The most common explanation is that it pertains to Christmas, as its first event was held in early January, shortly past the Christmas tide.

Beginnings of the initiative could be traced back to January 1993. Poland was in the state of flux past the downfall of communism. The nascent private sector was booming, but on the other hand several industries were on its knees. The public purse was not chock full of money, especially to fund growing needs of the health service, which has not moved ahead from the bygone era. From its beginnings, WOŚP was a fundraising, with proceeds aimed at purchasing medical equipment and donating them to public hospitals.

With time WOŚP collected more and more money, but also mobilised an army of enemies from the right wing of the political scene. Ample reasons could have been quoted, starting from outrage at Jerzy Owsiak, the initiative founder and leader, for espousing social views far from conservatism, through envy somebody recurringly mobilises an army of hearts, an achievement no one on the right side of the Polish political arena cannot boast of, to Mr Owsiak’s political involvement, unhidden since the very chap is hot-tempered.

Finances of WOŚP have been x-rayed by his enemies, claiming a far too small fraction of the money collected goes to purchases of medical equipment. I have analysed publicly available financial statements of the foundation and found no irregularities. Money raised from donators and bank account interest off it finance purchases of medical equipment (over a two-year observation period), while running costs of the foundation and its non-charity activities are covered by payments from sponsors and partners. Mr Owsiak and his life do live off running it, yet the founder’s salary is lower than mine, while his contribution to quality of life in Poland is a thousand times higher than mine, hence I see no point it in nitpicking.

If you compare annual proceeds from WOŚP to annual outlays on health service in Poland, you will find out WOŚP finances our health service for one day in a year. Two or three decades ago, deficiency of medial equipment was the major problem of the Polish healthcare system. Today, it is the shortage of doctors in combination with ageing society which brings the health service (not only in Poland) into imbalance. This problem is unlikely to be solved by any charity since it is a structural one, as supply of medical stuff is highly inelastic.

In 2026 WOŚP brings people together country-wide and has become an integral element of January (since 2021 the final day is on the last Sunday of January, being one of few Sundays in a year when shops are allowed to be open in Poland).

As in case of any charity, contributions to it ought to be voluntary. If you dislike it, for any reason, just do not donate. It is fine. But do not spread hatred. This year, as everyone noted, the range of loathing towards WOŚP in the public discourse was record-low. Maybe those not fond of the initiative have come to their senses and realised their outrage only boosts the funding for WOŚP.

With respect to me share in this magnificent pie, I can proudly boast of:
1) my home-made apple pie and cheesecake auctioned off for PLN 1,014
2) items I received as gifts as families under my care in Szlachetna Paczka in 2025 auctioned off in total for PLN 64,
3) I won auctions for:
- a handmade woollen cap and a scarf – bid of PLN 107,
- a voucher for bowling in Arena Ursynów – bid of PLN 160,
- a voucher for snooker in Arena Ursynów – bid of PLN 62,
4) besides I donated PLN 50 to a traditional can and PLN 30 to an online can.
The contribution above totals to PLN 1,487, which sets an ambitious target to be beaten in January 2027. Keep warm!