Thursday 1 April 2010

The worst human trait

I was taking pleasure in watching the sun going down today and out of the blue… it dawned on me. Many times I was wondering what the worst, the most irritating trait was and now I’m sure. What makes my hackles rise the most is UNRELIABILITY.

I can put up with many shortcomings. Not everyone has a gift of the gab, not everyone’s clever, not everyone’s creative, even-tempered, has a sense of humour etc. We have no influence on some of our traits, we are born with them, all we can do is to work on them, raise the bar for ourselves. Some traits are inborn, but others can be fully shaped. Two best examples are a penchant to depart from the truth and the unreliability. For ample reasons, people are inclined to find justifications and excuses for lying, in this respect I can turn a blind eye on this, since I can’t swear I am always truthful, I’m just human and oddly enough, I would find it easier to forgive a lie than a broken promise.

I’ve already met a few people, who’ll go down in my memory as totally undependable. Do you know what I mean? How many times has somebody told you they’d do something and they didn’t? I can’t stand repeating those promises “next time for sure I’ll do it”, “I promise to do it”. I feel treated like a downright idiot when I hear such hollow words for tenth time, because I know they will go down on their promise. They’ve done so several times, why should it be any different this time – I ask myself. In this very respect I raised the bar very high for myself. Most people who’ve cooperated with me would tell you they’d sooner forget about a promise I made, then I would. If I can’t do something, or can’t meet the deadline I let others know in advance, apologise, explain why and offer to do what I am supposed to do as soon as possible. I feel dirty bound to do so, cause if somebody trusts me they have a right to rely on me and expect me to meet my promises.

In my books, if you want be successful and appraised, you should set some standard for yourself, in my hierarchy I put reliability on the top. It’s in a way easier – whether I’m dependable or not depends only on me, not on my skills, flexibility, intelligence or features.

The unreliability is a cancer that infect contemporary societies, from its top (politicians who promise a lot before elections) down to families, companies, communities. “I’ll do it”, “I promise to do it”, “I can assure I’ll finish it off”, “For sure you’ll get it”. And more and more often I don’t believe, I was taught not to believe.

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