Driving an SUV

For years, I have detested SUVs at the very sight of them, but quite recently I was out of luck to have to sit behind the wheel of an oversized vehicle. Since that fateful day, I detest SUVs even more.

In 2023 my employer, underlining its unwavering greenwashing commitment, replaced the upper part of its fleet (of roughly 1,000 vehicles in total). It swapped Toyota Camrys (aged 2 - 4) for brand-new RAV4s. Nearly two tonnes propelled by a 2.5 litre petrol-fuelled engine with aid of electric power generator, definitely falls into an idea of low emissions.

On my way back from a site visit to a customer somewhere in southern Małopolska it was my turn to sit behind the wheel drive the team back to Warsaw.

Sitting high and looking from above is one of most often quoted merits of SUVs, which I totally don't hold with. I don't feel secure sitting with my thighs more vertical than horizontal. I don't feel safe finding it hard to estimate the vehicle's dimensions (despite the aid of rear camera and sensors) and not seeing well what us going on around. 

The least secure I felt due to gravity load laid much higher than in a traditional passenger car. Sensing how a vehicle holds the road and its stability is crucial for the comfort of driving. An SUV lacks it. Air resistance feels more severe. This impacts traction, noise inside and fuel consumption.

On a motorway the hybrid engine is not as frugal as in town and the accursed car drinks nearly 9 litres per 100 kilometres at the speed of 130 kmph and with 4 people on board. My Octavia in comparable conditions consumed recently 6.7 litres per 100 kilometres with westerly headwinds on.

The claim RAV4 with a hybrid engine is good for driving around town is not what I fall for. One should move around town on foot, by bike, by public transport, once a blue moon if the aforementioned ways are impossible, by a small or compact car, not an oversized vehicle dangerous for more vulnerable traffic participants.

Hence I drove it, but with unhidden disgust.

Back somewhere at the outskirts of Warsaw I was glad to sit behind the wheel of my Skoda Octavia estate (pure internal combustion engine with allegedly outdated manual gearbox I adore), which amid the fuel crisis and perfect weather for cycling, sits in the garage and is taken for a proper (30-kilometre) run roughly once a week (156 kilometres driven in total since returning from a business trip on 3 March). The car keeps fuel consumption close to 5.5 litres per 100 kilometres, a frugality beyond reach of any oversized vehicle.

Premonitions

I consider myself a down-to-earth and rational guy. My long-term decisions are rather well-though-out, grounded in analysis and stand to some reasons, while short-term choice happen to be made on the spur of the moment. I believe to some extent in fate, albeit find a rational explanation for twist.

May the called off trip to the USA serve as an example. My problems with spine had lasted for years, I strained it in warm months in the run-up to the cancelled holidays, so a logical chain of events leading up to my injury could be lined up. But when I turn off my brain, my heart tells me the fate has violently prevented me from popping the question. Since that serious health crisis the relationship has gone downhill, especially since it is easier to recognise how lousy it is when things go wrong.

At the turn of year I was down with flu. Being preoccupied with work and charity in the last quarter of the year explains why my immune system was weakened and why the course of the illness was quite severe. On those short, cold days spent mostly in bed I had a recurring premonition 2026 would bring a really tragic life-changing, yet not precisely defined event. I could imagine decease of one of my parents, a serious health crisis, a serious damage to my property or financial assets or something I would be recovering from for months. The only such event so far were the aforementioned problems with spine, with full recovery lasting around a year.

The premonition could have been logically caused by protracted stress experienced in 2025: struggling with my own health, my parents’ health, break-up and uphill dating, burn-out in Szlachetna Paczka, burn-out at work and a long fight to get promoted. None of those events is particularly brutal, but if they pile up and one has little room to regenerate, they can turn one’s hair more grey.

So far, the fears have not materialised. The worst that has happened to me was having my wrist mangled by the aggressive dog, but the recovery goes well, despite my thumb being numb several times a day.

Future-wise, I have grown obsessed with attempting to stay physically and mentally fit until old age, which I believe is overall positive. Since the beginning of Lent I have given up on sweets and salty snacks altogether and don’t miss it. After the accursed intoxication, I have given up alcohol for hell knows how long. Restriction for physical strain after being bite by the dog have prevented me from exercising daily and more intensive effort, but at least I walked for an hour each day.

The shape of my future fills me with some dread. Sociologists predict by 2030 45% of population under 40 would be single (quotation source needed, I read it, but can’t trace it back). With a growing self-focus finding a female life companion willing to raise a family might be difficult, not because I am not attractive enough and women would prefer more handsome or resourceful men, but because they will need no man at all. What humans want from life has changed. At some moments I suppose humanity is bound to extinct and it makes to point to preserve it from facing its despicable fate.

Petsitting (not to be repeated for a while)

I once portrayed the experience of living with a dog under one roof. Dogs are the most time-consuming and duty-burdening animals of those domesticated by humans. Apart from the period when Mela lived in my place, I played host to her and looked after her several times before and a few times after that. I realise taking care of a dog, especially on one’s own might be a nuisance, but I have also discovered how big a potential for building a relationship with a dog exists. Some would argue fostering a connection with an animal is much easier than with a fellow human and it is hard to prove them wrong.

Except for Mela who for some time was a household member, in January 2025 I took care of a 10-month old Border Collie for two weeks. Dogs of that breed are smart, yet demanding as hell too and looking after them, so that a BC fulfils its potential, takes a lot of time and dedication. Around that time I realised with the specifics of my work, i.e. being away from home for more than ten hours frequently and with one or two business trips per month, becoming a dog’s only minder was out of reach, but I could organise my work in such manner that I would work from home for a week or two when someone else’s dog would be staying at my place.

For starters in putting it into practice my friend and I chose Ringo – my friend’s mother’s enormously stressed-out dog. The case was more than difficult, but at the beginning the fearful dog appeared to be calm and trustful when by my side. We had a few meetings to break ice and for the passing week, Ringo was meant to holiday in my place.

To cut long story short, on the second day of his stay, the dog was so anxious enough, to become aggressive and to bite me severely on an attempt to take him for a walk (in the past he had been so scared of venturing outside that he could stay home for up to 36 hours without pissing). After this bout of aggression, the friend must have hurriedly turn up to take Ringo away, while I ended up in a hospital with the wounds inflicted by the aggressive dog. Luckily, neither tendons nor muscles have been fractured and I am already pulling through (with a ban for any physical exercise which might cause bleeding in effect until Tuesday), though scars on the skin might keep me company for months or even for a lifetime.

For some time, I will not be trying to hit it off with any dog. After going overboard with alcohol in February I feel repulsion towards alcohol which has not eased off markedly. Now, after being attacked by a dog at my home, I will feel diffident towards them for a while. For posterity, the night I spent with Ringo under my roof was the period of most acute stress I experienced since several years. Each day I have to tackle challenging or rather nerve-wracking situations and handle them, but I am not accustomed to fearing being physically attacked by any creature. Being at such peril has made me appreciate the safety I am in the luck to have a part of my daily grind.

CringedIn

I have four reasons to use LinkedIn daily:
1) Mini Sudoku,
2) Queens,
3) Tango,
4) ZIP.
The numbers assigned are not incidental, since my routine is to play those four logical games in that very order. Besides, I have recently updated my profile so that people who check who I am are not confused.

For several years I used to keep away from LI for months and upon logging I discovered job proposal sent nearly a year earlier.

LinkedIn has developed in a similar way other social platforms have done. From a collection of people's CVs it has evolved into a combination of blogs, discussion groups, but most of all, bragging about members' professional (but not only) accomplishments. Unlike in most other social media, number of followers does not monetise in proceeds from advertising, but translates into new business opportunities in real life. In certain professions promoting oneself and building a "personal brand" (this phrase sucks) is inevitable and those who shun it, sadly lag behind.

The above is not my cup of tea, so I consider myself lucky to be prohibited (banking secrecy law prevents me from boasting of my achievements) from playing this lousy game. My professional value is shaped by how my workmates perceive me. Being a reliable and supportive leader and knowledgeable and trustworthy partner in dealmaking defines me, not a number of shitty self-flattering on LinkedIn.

Given the above, no wonder some sort of people overly active on LI are commonly mocked. The most renowned Polish page on platform making fun of horrific self-adoration practices in KrindżedIn (CringedIn). Their sense of humour takes my fancy.

At the end of the day, we work to live (it up), not the other way round. Definitely it feels better if your job brings you satisfaction, but working only to earn money is not a crime. Keep then in mind the essence of your life should be out of your workplace.

Warfare enters its fifth year

The special three-day operation of taking over Ukraine has gone on for more than four years. Four years ago nearly nobody expected that war to last that long, nor believed Ukraine would be capable of resisting the invader and keeping the frontline basically unchanged for months.

The Western countries have shaken off the shock quickly and launched a stream of military and financial aid to Ukraine, often depleting their defensive resources. The invasion has been a wake-up call for those still deluding themselves Russia would not infringe principles set out in the civilised world.

Hollow promises of the US president have not brought a ceasefire for more than a year and little implies there is a chance for warfare suspension in near future. This buys time for Western Europe for preparation for a war with Russia, while the tsar's country slowly bleeds out instead of growing stronger. 

In early 2026 Ukrainians have endured a first harsh winter since the onset of war. As the oppressor focused on destroying the country's energy infrastructure, millions of them have lived through a humanitarian disaster living in blocks of flats devoid of electricity, central heating and running water (except for that from heating pipes cracking when frozen over).

The nation as a whole remains valiant, though it is worth underlining civilians living far from the frontline are not as severely affected as during typical warfare. Ukrainians have got used to (as one can get used to everything) to blackouts, cold and having to run to shelters a few times a week, but except for that, their lives are not at constant peril. The enemy's missiles, rockets and drones target infrastructure, but to a much lesser extent, residential areas.

Over the past months the frontline has not moved much west, while in the recent weeks, thank to disruption of Starlink connection, Ukrainians have regained control over some minor areas (which are burnt grounds anyway). Peace talks are going nowhere and nothing is going to change in this respect, as the invader is not a trustworthy partner.

As four years ago the outbreak of war was beyond our imagination, these days the vision of end of war is also equally hard to imagine. I realise it is a controversial assertion, yet I keep fingers crossed for continuation of warfare. Firstly, since I fear Russia, devoid of the burden of warfare and (heaven forfend) with sanctions lifted will be able to step up preparations for a war with NATO. Secondly, the Polish labour market, deprived of only part of the Ukrainian workforce, will plunge into a structural crisis, as most low-paid jobs have been taken up by migrants (or refugees) from Ukraine. Poles are no longer interested in many of those occupations, so to fill the gap, if some of Ukrainians head home, substantial pay rises would be necessary, triggering a spike in inflation.

#StandWithUkraine

#UkraineStayStrong